Our Gospel today expresses how Jesus cared for His Church that He is protecting it against any forces that would destroy its purpose. As I reflect on this Gospel, I asked myself, now that I am on Postulancy Formation how do I protect my own little church here at Our Lady’s Hill – our own community against any forces that would destroy its purpose. Am I strong enough to face the challenges of protecting the community where I belong? And as I am asking these questions to myself I also challenge you my dear brothers to consider these questions in your own selves.
From the start, our Lord Jesus deeply desires that a Christian community like ours will experience oneness and harmony. And as we go on to our relationship day by day we can say that unity is the soul of our fellowship. And as a fellowship, we consider ourselves as part of the family of God, and it is our duty to protect the unity of our own community, protect our relationship and promote harmony among ourselves.
And as we continue to reflect on the challenge of protecting our community against any force that would destroy its purpose, together, let us ask ourselves six important questions to see how we relate with each other within our community and how we protect our relationship.
First, do we focus on what we have in common, or do we focus on our differences? St. Paul advised the early Christian communities to concentrate on the things which make for harmony, and on the growth of one another’s character. In our PSI I and PSI II sessions, we have discovered our own uniqueness and differences. It was God who chose us to be unique in many ways – different personalities, family and educational backgrounds, career and preferences, so we are challenged by God to value and enjoy those differences and not merely celebrate them. Rick Warren in one of his book, cited that God wants unity in us and not uniformity. In this early stage of Carmelite formation, Jesus is challenging us to focus on what matters most – to love one another just as He did, and not to focus on our indifferences, because if we do, division and conflict among ourselves will always arise.
Second question is: Are we realistic in our expectations? It is common that when we relate with others, the ideal and the real always clash. If we are too idealistic with our relationships, we easily get hurt and disappointed when someone has not met our expectations and the whole community is affected. But, when we discover that God intends real community to be, it is easy to become discouraged between the ideal and the real in our community. During the seven-month period that we are here in Our Lady’s Hill, we may have discovered many things about our brothers that we never expected. We may have discovered talents and gifts, at the same time we may have discovered many imperfections. Some may have hurt us in some ways, but Jesus is challenging us not to use imperfections and hurtful instances to stop relating with any one of us. St. Paul said to the Ephesians: “Be always humble, gentle and patient. Show your love by being tolerant with one another.”
Third, do we criticize rather than to encourage? If we can notice in our society today even in small communities, it is always easier to stand on the sidelines and take shots at those who are serving than it is to get involved and make contribution. St. Paul is reminding us not to stand in judgment or look down on others whose conviction differ from our own. He added that we must always aim to those things that bring peace and that help strengthen one another.
Fourth, do we refuse to listen to gossips and unnecessary talkings? Rick Warren defined gossip as passing on information when one is neither part of the problem nor part of the solution. He further explained that listening to gossip is like accepting stolen property, and it makes you just as guilty of the crime. When gossips seem to destroy our relationship, do we have the guts to say: “ Please stop. I don’t need to know this. Have you talked directly to the person?” Nakakalungkot isipin na in God’s flock, the greatest wounds of gossips usually come from the other sheep, not from the wolves.
Fifth, do we practice God’s method for conflict resolution? Matthew 18:15 summarizes this method. “If your brother sins against you, go to him and show him his fault. But do it privately, just between yourselves. If he listens to you, you have won your brother back. But, if he will not listen to you, take one or two other persons with you, so that every accusation may be upheld by the testimony of two or more witnesses, as the scripture says. An if he will not listen to them, then tell the whole thing to the Church.”
And lastly, for the leaders, do we practice what we preach to our members? And to the members, do we support our leaders? In a community, it is normal that we appoint our leader, and we have the responsibility to support him for whatever decisions he will make for the common good of all, and the same time he should always adher to what the group had agreed upon, and he should always be a model of humility, true servant-leadership, love and respect.
From my Spiritual Journal
11/16/2004
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